Poetry: Minimum Wage Entertainment by Paul Tanner
minimum wage entertainment
by Paul Tanner
we had this competition going
where we’d see who would have to
repeat themselves the most.
so like, a customer would ask one of you:
got any blah blahs left?
and you’d say no,
and he’d say what, none at all?
and you’d say no,
and he’d say, none in the back?
and you’d say no
and meanwhile, your colleague
would be at the counter,
tallying it up on a bit of receipt paper …
your customer would say, you haven’t got any reserved for someone else?
and you’d say no
and he’d say, you sure about that?
and you’d say yeah
and he’d say, right, and that’s final, is it?
and you’d say, yeah
and he’d say, so what you’re telling me is, you haven’t got any?
that’s what you’re telling me, is it?
and you’d say yeah.
ok, he’d say, well, thanks for wasting my time
then march out
and Kieran would be like: damn, son, seven times! we have a winner!
and you’d tell Kieran: yeah, two sugars please, you know,
because the loser had to put the kettle on?
but there’d still be everything to play for
as a middle aged woman
with a church hat
trotted in,
her face pinched
in anticipation of
her inevitable disappointment.
About the author
Tanner has been earning minimum wage, and writing about it, for 15 years now. No, really. His novel ‘Jobseeker’ is on Amazon. He was shortlisted for the Erbacce 2020 Poetry Prize. His latest collection ‘Shop Talk: Poems for Shop Workers’ is published by Penniless Press.
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